Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A Quip About Nips

I saw a lot of ugly, offensive shit this summer while I was apartment-sitting in a place with cable TV. Not the least of which was this ad for a stupid bra that conceals your nipples with two petal-shaped padded concaves on the inside of the bra cup--a stylish secret for extra modest ladies! Give me a fucking break. From a pragmatic standpoint, I get it--most women (myself included) hate to have their nips ogled on a cold day. But these "concealer" bras are just insulting--better cover up those nips, girls, or else you're just asking for it! If ever there were a time to bring back bra burning...but there isn't, really. I feel like nowadays it's just as futile to complain about nip concealers in a public forum as it is to prance around shamelessly in a thin shirt--being open about such things carries its own (backwards) sex appeal, and who am I to criticize a guy for checking out a nice set of boobs if they're in plain sight? But creating a bra that hides or constricts your rack even more than usual isn't going to stop men from being assholes--it's only going to make women even more ashamed of what they're carrying. Just from googling around for some info on that stupid bra, I found all kinds of disappointing "tips" from women on how to hide your nips so that you can work in an airconditioned office building, how to pull duct tape off your nips at the end of the day with the least amount of pain, etc--on sites like eHow and Yahoo! Whatever. I'm not bold enough to withstand the social side effects of going blatantly braless, so I usually make a halfhearted effort to keep my nips in check. But if they show, I deal with it. I'm certainly not going to spend money on a special bra just because pervs on the street can't keep their boners to themselves. Maybe men should try a little harder to conceal their thoughts and quit rubbernecking. It's not very attractive.


Carrie said...

For real.

It's not my job to contort or cover my body so that you have one less opportunity to be an asshole.

Boobs are great, but ogling is, at the least, unprofessional.

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